Section III Writing
Part A
题目分析
命题透视
2007年应用文考查的是公务信函之一——建议信,作文题目没有情景交代,只有一个笼统的提纲:建议大学图书馆改进服务。因此考生自由发挥的余地大,写作不会有太大障碍。只要不跑题,可以随意发挥,关于改进图书馆服务的各项建议均可提及。
根据教育部公布的《大纲解析》,考研应用文不需写信封、日期、地址,只写称呼、正文、落款即可。由于是公务信函,称呼可写Dear Sir or Madam或To whom it may concern,后面最好使用英式英语中的逗号,不要使用美式英语中的冒号。
书写格式最好使用缩进式,正文的段与段之间不空行,每段首行缩进4~5个字母并对齐。首段可进行自我介绍:说明自己的身份——大学生;然后说明写作目的:建议改进服务。第二段应针对图书馆的服务问题提出两三点具体建议,切勿空发议论。由于是针对机构的建议信,尾段可以表示感谢,期待回信。
落款应写在稿纸中间偏右的位置,写成两行。首行是结尾客套语Yours sincerely或Sincerely yours;次行签名应写Li Ming,切勿写真实姓名。
建议信不是投诉信,观点应该合情合理,注意礼貌当先。首段自我介绍不要啰嗦,说明目的,注意语气;主体段提出具体建议,最好首先肯定优点,再写改进内容,否则容易变成投诉信。在信中经常与收信人进行交流,注意对方感受,时时提到你和我,否则易变成议论文。尾段总结建议,注意礼貌,让对方易于接受。
经典范文
Dear Sir or Madam,
As a regular library user, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to you for the help you gave me. I am writing the letter in purpose of offering some conducive recommendations to upgrade the quality of your service.
Firstly, a great many students express their frustration with our library in that there are usually many students in long lines waiting for assistance. Secondly, since computers are used by all major libraries to streamline cataloguing, we should have access to the Internet via computers. Lastly, I shall be much obliged to you if you could kindly replace all the outdated facilities and provide more conveniences to readers.
I hope you will find the proposals practical. Your prompt attention to my suggestions would be highly appreciated.
Yours sincerely,
Li Ming
中文翻译
尊敬的先生或女士:
作为贵馆的常来读者,我想对您给予的帮助致以诚挚的谢意。我写这封信的目的是想提出一些有益的建议来提升您的服务质量。
首先,由于等候帮助时总是排队很长,很多学生表达了他们的不满。其次,由于所有的大型图书馆都使用电脑来简化检索,我们应该将电脑接通互联网。最后,如果您能好心地替换所有过时的设备并为读者提供更多便利,我将十分感谢。
希望您觉得这些建议切实可行。非常感谢您及时关注这些建议。
您真诚的,
李明
范文评析
本文共三段、七句,是“总—分—总”结构。内容方面:覆盖了提纲中所有信息点;结构方面:合理组织了文章结构,使内容统一连贯;语言方面:基本正确,丰富多变;格式和语域符合要求。
首段两句,首句进行自我介绍,使用了介词短语置于句首作状语、定语从句。按照建议信的规范写法,首先应肯定优点,再写改进内容,以便对方易于接受建议。反之,如果直接提出建议,则看起来更像投诉信。考生应该注意这两种书信的区别,切勿混为一谈。首段第二句说明写作目的,使用了介词短语作目的状语。
第二段是书信的主体段,共三句,采用并列结构,提出三点建议——缩短等候时间、接通互联网、更换过时设备并提供更多便利,使用了firstly, secondly, lastly三个简洁明了的关联词。首句出现了置于句尾的原因状语从句和there be句型;第二句出现了置于句首的原因状语从句和被动语态;尾句使用了条件状语从句和并列谓语。
尾段共两句,进行小结,再次表示感谢,同时期待回信。写给个人的建议信无须表示感谢,但本文是写给机构的建议信,可以表示适当的感谢。
精彩表达
regular 经常的
would like to想要
gratitude 感谢
in purpose of 以……为目的
conducive 有益的
recommendation 建议
a great many 很多
frustration 沮丧
streamline 简化
have access to 接通
be obliged to 感激
outdated 过时的
facility 设备
convenience 便利
proposal 建议
practical 切实可行的
prompt 及时的
佳句拓展
1. I am writing the letter to propose some conducive recommendations to you as regards your major. 我写这封信是为了对你的专业提出一些有用的建议。
2. I hope you find these proposals useful. 我希望您觉得这些建议有用。
3. I trust you will take my suggestions into account. 我相信您会考虑我的建议。
考生作文
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am a student in this university who regularly come to the library to spend my spare time. Generally speaking, the services you offer here is quite good; however, I have some suggestions for you to adopt. And I would like to extend my greatest appreciation if you are so kind as to take my suggestions into consideration.
To begin with, will you please prolong the time for reading? In the daytime, most of the students are having class, so they can’t come to the library. Moreover, some of the books on shelves are out of date. If you are so kind as to provide us some books such as the latest magazines, we will be greatly honored.
I really wish to have a more comfortable library. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Yours sincerely,
Li Ming
中文翻译
尊敬的先生/女士:
我是本校的一名学生,常来图书馆度过闲暇时光。总的来说,您这里提供的服务相当不错,但是,我有一些建议希望您采纳。如果您能好心考虑我的建议,我将非常感谢。
首先,您是否可以延长阅读时间?在白天,大多数学生在上课,因此他们无法来图书馆。其次,书架上有些书已经过时了。如果您能好心提供诸如最新期刊等书籍,我们将非常感谢。
我非常希望拥有一个更舒适的图书馆。再次感谢您的时间和关注。
您真诚的,
李明
作文评析
全文共三段、九句、134词。首段三句,首句进行自我介绍,使用了主系表结构、介词短语作定语、定语从句。由于这是一封公务建议信,自我介绍可以使得文章不太突兀。作者表明自己常来本校图书馆,自然使得建议真实可信。第二句表明书信的写作目的:提出建议,使用了欲抑先扬的写作手法,写作构思值得借鉴。公务建议信的地道写法应是先肯定对方的服务,再提改进措施,这样对方更容易接受建议。第二句出现了定语从句、主系表结构和并列句。第三句表示感谢,使得文章语气委婉,非常客气,完全符合公务建议信的固定写法,运用了条件状语从句。首段先后使用了regularly, spare time, generally speaking, offer, adopt, would like to, so... as to, take into consideration等精彩表达。美中不足的是,首段出现了两次主谓一致的小错误。首句come应改为comes,与主语who(=a student)保持一致;第二句is quite good应改为are quite good,与主语services保持一致。
第二段共四句,具体提出两点建议:延长时间、购进新书。第一、二两句提出第一点建议,第一句提出建议,使用了一般疑问句,使句型丰富多变;第二句说明原因,出现了介词短语放在句首作状语、现在进行时和并列句。第三、四两句提出第二点建议,第三句说明原因,运用了介词短语作定语和主系表结构;第四句提出建议并且再次表示感谢,出现了条件状语从句和主系表结构。第二段依次使用to begin with, prolong, in the daytime, most of the students(=most students,更加书面化), moreover, some of the books(=some books,更加书面化), out of date等精彩语言。
尾段共两句。首句再次重申写作目的,希望对方改进服务,与首段前后呼应。比较级more comfortable的运用使得语气更加委婉。尾句第三次表示感谢,使得整篇文章的语域使用恰如其分。
万能框架
建议信
Dear Sir/Madam,
Generally speaking, the services you offer here are quite good. However, I have some suggestions for you to adopt. And I would like to extend my greatest appreciation if you are so kind as to take my suggestions into consideration.
In the first place, would you please______? In the second place, it is necessary for you to______. If you would like to take my recommendations into account, I would be very pleased.
I am looking forward to a favorable reply at your earliest convenience. I would like to take this opportunity to show my heartfelt gratitude to the kind assistance you give me.
Yours sincerely,
Li Ming
参考译文
尊敬的先生/女士:
一般而言,您这里提供的服务相当不错,但我有一些建议希望您采纳。如果您能好心考虑我的建议,我将不胜感激。
首先,您是否可以______?其次,您很有必要______。如果您能考虑我的建议,我将非常高兴。
期待着尽快得到一个圆满的答复。对于您给予我的热切帮助,我想借此机会表达衷心的感谢!
您真诚的,
李明
预测练习
Directions:
You are studying at university and one of your lecturers has asked his students to write and suggest ways in which he could improve his teaching. Write an email to the lecturer. Say the way you enjoy about his lectures and suggest how they could be improved.
You should write no less than 100 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
Do not sign your own name at the end of the letter. Use“Li Ming”instead.
Do not write the address.
注:预测练习题的经典范文及译文请参见《预测范文精编》,可登录本书封面上的下载地址下载。
Part B
题目分析
命题透视
2007年考研大作文题目比较抽象。图画是点球决战的场面,面对点球这一巨大的挑战与困难,守门员想到的是球门如此之大,自身如此渺小,自然悲从中来;而球员想到的却是球门如此之小,守门员如此神武,不敢轻举妄动。面对挑战,双方想到的都是困难重重,缺乏自信。这是一幅反面现象的图画。
考研写作的评分标准是:语言第一位、结构第二位、内容第三位。阅卷老师最重视的是语言功底,而非逻辑构思;考研写作是语言考试,而非思维考试。在考场上有限的时间内,切勿浪费太多时间进行构思,只要观点相关即可。
考研写作的观点并无正确与错误之分,因此本文可围绕自信、挑战、人生态度、同一问题角度不同这些话题展开,只要不离题太远即可。写作关键是语言基本正确,丰富多变;结构清晰,逻辑严谨。
根据教育部公布的《大纲解析》,大作文四大要素为描述、寓意、分析、评论。首段应是图画描述,不应发表太多议论,否则属于跑题。图画描述至少应有两句,如果对图画只字未提,扣三分之一的分数;如果对图画只描述一句,属于描述不充分,扣3分。针对此题,可将大图总体描述一句,然后将两幅小图分别描述一句即可。
第二段意义阐释,可以分析这个问题的背景、事实、反方观点、原因或后果;进行因果、分类、定义解释、统计事实、正反论证均可。由于第三点提纲是举例论证,第二段应对问题进行分析评论,不宜举例。
第三段应为举例论证,难度不大。根据提纲,举出一至两个例子即可。最好不要流于记叙,应有主题句和小结,写成夹叙夹议的形式。提纲中并未要求提出建议措施,可以不写。
经典范文
It is symbolically illustrated in the cartoon that a striker is preparing to shoot at the goal defended by a goalkeeper on a football field. In the goalkeeper’s mind, he is so much smaller than he actually is that guarding the goal becomes an impossible mission. On the contrary, the giant guard seems to fill up the whole goal in the attacking player’s mind.
The purpose of the drawing is to show us that in the face of seemingly insurmountable challenges or predicaments, possessing self-confidence is of utmost significance. Regardless of how much success one has had in school or at work, there are bound to be times when he will encounter problems. It is at these critical times that his self-confidence, towards difficulty and life in general, eventually plays a crucial role in determining whether he can turn failure into victory.
I can think of no better illustration than the following one. Helen Keller was born deaf, dumb and blind, certainly nothing to give her self-confidence. Nevertheless, she went on to conquer her multiple handicaps to finally become a writer and lecturer, becoming an inspiration to all. This case effectively clarifies that no matter what tasks we are confronted with, we should never overestimate the difficulties or underestimate our abilities.
中文翻译
这幅漫画生动地描述了足球场上的一名前锋正准备将球射入守门员把守的球门。在守门员看来,自己比实际的身材渺小很多,以至于守门变成了一个不可能完成的任务。反之,在那名前锋眼里,这位巨人守门员似乎占据了整个球门。
这幅漫画的目的是告诉我们在看似不可克服的挑战与困境面前,最重要的是要拥有自信。无论一个人曾经在学校或工作中如何成功,他总有遇到难题的时候。在这些关键时期,正是他面对困难和人生时的自信最终决定他能否反败为胜。
没有什么比下面的例子更有说服力。海伦·凯勒天生聋哑失明,没什么可以让她自信的。但她不断克服多重障碍,最终成为一名作家和教师,成为世人的楷模。这个例子清楚地证明了无论面临何种任务,我们决不能高估困难或低估自己的能力。
范文评析
本文共三段、十句,是“总—分—总”结构。语法、拼写、标点正确,用词恰当,语言自然流畅,词汇和语法结构丰富多变。有效使用了多种衔接手法,文字连贯,层次清晰;内容完整,论证充分。
首段图画描述共三句,是“总—分”结构。首句总体描述图画的三大要素,即人物(前锋+守门员)、动作(射门+守门)、环境(足球场),使用了形式主语、被动语态、主语从句、现在进行时和过去分词短语作后置定语。第二、三两句分别挖掘两幅小图的细节,构成并列结构。第二句描述在守门员眼中,任务艰巨、无法完成,出现了介词短语放在句首作状语、主系表结构、比较状语从句和表语从句。第三句描述在前锋眼中,对手强大、难以战胜。
第二段意义阐释共三句,是“总—分—总”结构。首句是主题句及全文的中心思想,点出图画的深层象征寓意:面对挑战应该充满自信,使用了主系表结构、不定式短语作表语、动名词短语作主语。第二、三两句进行正反论证,第二句进行让步,使用了介词短语放在句首作状语、现在完成时、there be 句型、定语从句。第三句进行正面论证和小结,使用了强调句、介词短语作定语和宾语从句。
第三段举例论证共四句,是“总—分—总”结构。首句承上启下进行过渡。第二、三两句使用海伦·凯勒的例子进行论证,说服力强,使用了一般过去时和动名词作伴随状语。尾句进行小结,前后呼应,运用了宾语从句和让步状语从句。
精彩表达
mission 任务
on the contrary 相反
in the face of 面临
challenge 挑战
predicament 困境
self-confidence 自信
be of utmost significance 非常重要
regardless of 无论
be bound to 一定
encounter problems 遇到难题
critical 关键的
eventually 最终
play a crucial role 发挥重要作用
turn failure into victory 转败为胜
illustration 例子
multiple 多重的
inspiration 激励
be confronted with 面临
overestimate 高估
underestimate 低估
佳句拓展
1. Although physical education is part of most children’s education, many students go through their formative years without developing a lasting interest in sports. 尽管体育教育是大多数孩子所接受教育的一部分,但是许多学生在性格形成时期并没有形成对体育的长期兴趣。
2. A final reason for promoting enthusiasm for sports in children is to enhance their sense of national pride. 促使孩子对体育感兴趣的最后一个原因是为了提升孩子的民族自豪感。
3. Children who develop a stronger sense of national pride will be more willing to serve society and look after their country when they grow up. 怀有较强民族自豪感的孩子在他们长大后会更愿意为社会服务,为国家效力。
4. A lonely heart tends to regard genuine love from other human beings as the greatest happiness; and a man confined to a wheelchair may have no other wish than to walk like a normal person. 一颗孤独的心灵往往会把来自其他人的真爱视为最大的幸福;而一个必须坐在轮椅上的人可能除了希望像普通人一样走路之外别无他求。
5. An additional reason that makes it difficult for average people to understand the true meaning of happiness rests with the subtle distinction between“taking”and“giving”. 普通人很难理解幸福的真正含义的另一原因在于“索取”和“给予”之间微妙的区别。
6. For some people, the thought of“taking”gives them a thrill, while many others insist that true happiness can only be derived from generous“giving”. 对有些人来说,“索取”的想法使他们很兴奋,而其他很多人坚持认为真正的幸福只能源于慷慨的“给予”。
考生作文
As we can see from the picture, a football match is going on. On guarding the door, the left man seems to be keeping a“huge door”that is easy and inevitable for a goal, while the right person hesitates to kick the ball with an illusion about the“huge door keeper”. It is obvious that both of them exaggerate the difficulties in front of them.
This photo does reflect a thought-provoking social phenomenon which is not uncommon in China now. The young always give up because the problem is beyond their ability to cope with. Superficially, it seems to be somewhat reasonable, but when weighing in the mind, we find there is an apparent tendency underlying this phenomenon: the lack of confidence. Firstly, it is well-known that we exist in a dynamic world with various difficulties. We can do nothing but face them. Secondly, attitude is the key point to take the first step. Assume bravery and confidence to solve the problem, you will find the question is not as“huge”as you imagine. Take us for example, the entrance exam for graduate students even seems to a horrible monster before us. Some people give up, some persist. So, with confidence and the right assessment of the difficulties, try and exert your strength, and then we will overcome all problems.
On the whole, I believe we young people should face the difficulties in right manner. And nothing is impossible, just do it.
中文翻译
如图所示,一场足球赛正在进行。左边的人似乎在守一座对于射门来讲轻而易举、不可避免的“大门”,而右边的人则有一种关于“巨大的守门员”的幻觉,踢球很犹豫。显而易见,这两个人都夸大了摆在他们面前的困难。
这幅图画确实反映了一个目前在中国发人深思的普遍社会现象。由于问题超出他们的解决能力,年轻人总是容易放弃。表面上看,图画似乎有一点道理,但仔细思考之后,我们发现在此现象之下,有一种明显的趋势,那就是缺乏自信。首先,众所周知,我们生活在一个困难众多的动态世界。我们别无选择,只能面对。其次,态度是走出第一步的关键。只要拥有勇气和信心来解决问题,你会发现问题并非你想的那么“严重”。以我们自己为例,研究生入学考试似乎是我们面前的一个可怕的怪物。有些人放弃了,而有些人则坚持不懈。因此,只要拥有信心和对困难的正确估计,竭尽全力发挥长处,我们就能解决所有问题。
总而言之,我认为我们年轻人应该用正确的方式面对困难。世上无难事,只怕有心人。
作文评析
本文是2007年教育部公布的当年唯一一篇19分大作文,也是2007年大作文的“写作状元”。全文共三段、15句、243词。首段图画描述共三句,展开第一点提纲,是“总—分—总”结构。首句总体描述图画中的事物和动作,使用了方式状语从句、现在进行时。第二句挖掘图画细节,串连成句,先后出现了介词短语放在句首作状语、主系表结构、定语从句、并列句、介词短语作状语。尾句点出图画的象征寓意:不要夸大困难,使用了it作形式主语、主系表结构、主语从句和介词短语置名词后作定语。首段依次运用了inevitable, hesitate, it is obvious that, exaggerate等精彩表达。表达“守门”时使用guard, keep进行同义替换;“人物”则使用man, person, both of them进行替换。
美中不足的是,教育部明确指出,本段的图画描述尚有欠缺,同时出现了一些小的用词错误。“球门”应为goal,并非door;守门员应为goalkeeper或keeper,并非door keeper(看门人);the left man应为the man on the left;the right person应为the person on the right。如能使用goalkeeper或keeper表示守门员;使用striker表示射手或使用forward,attacking player表示前锋;使用be ready to score the goal into the net或be ready to shoot表示“准备射门”,首段将更为精彩。由此可以看出,考研作文第一段重在使用自己的语言准确描述图画中的具体细节,盲目套用模板或空发议论只能带来低分的“噩梦”。
第二段意义阐释+举例论证,共10句,展开第二、三两点提纲,是“总—分—总”结构。前三句为总论,首句为过渡句,承上启下,使用了定语从句;第二句交代背景,出现了原因状语从句、主系表结构、介词短语作表语和作定语。第三句点出全文的中心思想,也是图画的象征寓意,呼应第二点提纲,运用了欲抑先扬的论证手段、主系表结构、并列句、时间状语从句、省略句(补全为we are weighing in the mind)、宾语从句、倒装句(there be)、现在分词短语作后置定语(underlying this phenomenon)。第四至七句进行因果论证,展开两点原因。第四、五两句展开原因一,第四句交代背景,第五句说明原因:人生天地间,困难无可避;第六、七两句展开原因二,第六句出现了主系表结构、不定式短语作定语;第七句运用了省略句(assume)、比较状语从句(as...as...)。
第二段第八、九两句进行举例论证,展开第三点提纲,举出考研考生的例子,真实可信,具有说服力。第八句再次出现主系表结构,第九句使用了并列句,简短有力。尾句对全段进行总结,运用了介词短语放在句首作原因状语、祈使句。
第三段归纳总结,共两句,首句总结全文,尾句恰如其分地使用了Adidas和Nike两个运动品牌的广告词,包装结尾、展开呼吁。本文的黑体字部分为写作的一些万能句型,但均为该考生自己总结或发挥的,在当年尤为与众不同。
万能框架
人生哲理类
As is vividly revealed in the cartoon,______. We are informed that“______”. Some people believe that______, while others argue that______.
One factor that plays a role in determining our opportunities in life is random chance. Some people are born with certain opportunities. For example, Prince William would not be second in line to the British throne if his father were anyone other than Prince Charles. In addition to the element of______,______stems from individual attitudes and mindsets. Opportunities often exist all around us, waiting for those with the courage and enterprise to seize them. Finally, many of our opportunities are the result of hard work and perseverance. While utilizing one’s natural endowments and taking advantage of existing chances is important, new opportunities can only be created through effort and action.
In sum, I believe that______depends on a combination of factors, including random chance, individual mindset, and the degree of one’s perseverance. To make the most of our lives, we must seize the chance, maintain an optimistic attitude, and work hard to achieve our goals.
参考译文
漫画生动地揭示了,______。文字说明显示:“______”。有些人认为______,另一些人认为______。
我们遇到机遇的一个很重要的因素就是巧合。有些人先天就有优越的条件。例如,威廉王子如果没有查尔斯这个父亲,他不可能成为英国王位的第二继承人。除了______因素,______还来源于个人的态度和心态。机遇往往就在我们周围,等待那些有勇气和事业心的人去抓住它们。最后,我们的许多机会源于勤奋和坚持不懈。虽然充分利用一个人的先天条件和现有的机会十分重要,但是新的机会,只能通过自身努力和实际行动才能创造出来。
总之,我认为______取决于多种因素,包括偶然巧合、个人心态以及一定程度的个人努力。为了让我们的生活更加充实,我们必须抓住机会,保持乐观积极的态度,努力工作以实现我们的目标。
预测练习
Directions:
Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should
1) describe the drawing briefly,
2) explain its intended meaning , and
3) give your comments.
注:预测练习题的经典范文及译文请参见《预测范文精编》,可登录本书封面上的下载地址下载。