第44章
He put on a more vigorous mood.
Now,we will go and get some breakfast.
No,no!she begged.I cannot eat.I MUST get back to Endelstow.
Elfride was as if she had grown years older than Stephen now.
But you have had nothing since last night but that cup of tea at Bristol.
I cant eat,Stephen.
Wine and biscuit?
No.
Nor tea,nor coffee?
No.
A glass of water?
No.I want something that makes people strong and energetic for the present,that borrows the strength of to-morrow for use to-
day--leaving to-morrow without any at all for that matter;or even that would take all life away to-morrow,so long as it enabled me to get home again now.Brandy,thats what I want.That womans eyes have eaten my heart away!
You are wild;and you grieve me,darling.Must it be brandy?
Yes,if you please.
How much?
I dont know.I have never drunk more than a teaspoonful at once.All I know is that I want it.Dont get it at the Falcon.
He left her in the fields,and went to the nearest inn in that direction.Presently he returned with a small flask nearly full,and some slices of bread-and-butter,thin as wafers,in a paper-
bag.Elfride took a sip or two.
It goes into my eyes,she said wearily.I cant take any more.
Yes,I will;I will close my eyes.Ah,it goes to them by an inside route.I dont want it;throw it away.
However,she could eat,and did eat.Her chief attention was concentrated upon how to get the horse from the Falcon stables without suspicion.Stephen was not allowed to accompany her into the town.She acted now upon conclusions reached without any aid from him:his power over her seemed to have departed.
You had better not be seen with me,even here where I am so little known.We have begun stealthily as thieves,and we must end stealthily as thieves,at all hazards.Until papa has been told by me myself,a discovery would be terrible.
Walking and gloomily talking thus they waited till nearly nine oclock,at which time Elfride thought she might call at the Falcon without creating much surprise.Behind the railway-station was the river,spanned by an old Tudor bridge,whence the road diverged in two directions,one skirting the suburbs of the town,and winding round again into the high-road to Endelstow.Beside this road Stephen sat,and awaited her return from the Falcon.
He sat as one sitting for a portrait,motionless,watching the chequered lights and shades on the tree-trunks,the children playing opposite the school previous to entering for the morning lesson,the reapers in a field afar off.The certainty of possession had not come,and there was nothing to mitigate the youths gloom,that increased with the thought of the parting now so near.
At length she came trotting round to him,in appearance much as on the romantic morning of their visit to the cliff,but shorn of the radiance which glistened about her then.However,her comparative immunity from further risk and trouble had considerably composed her.Elfrides capacity for being wounded was only surpassed by her capacity for healing,which rightly or wrongly is by some considered an index of transientness of feeling in general.
Elfride,what did they say at the Falcon?
Nothing.Nobody seemed curious about me.They knew I went to Plymouth,and I have stayed there a night now and then with Miss Bicknell.I rather calculated upon that.
And now parting arose like a death to these children,for it was imperative that she should start at once.Stephen walked beside her for nearly a mile.During the walk he said sadly:
Elfride,four-and-twenty hours have passed,and the thing is not done.
But you have insured that it shall be done.
O Stephen,you ask how!Do you think I could marry another man on earth after having gone thus far with you?Have I not shown beyond possibility of doubt that I can be nobody elses?Have I not irretrievably committed myself?--pride has stood for nothing in the face of my great love.You misunderstood my turning back,and I cannot explain it.It was wrong to go with you at all;and though it would have been worse to go further,it would have been better policy,perhaps.Be assured of this,that whenever you have a home for me--however poor and humble--and come and claim me,I am ready.She added bitterly,When my father knows of this days work,he may be only too glad to let me go.
Perhaps he may,then,insist upon our marriage at once!Stephen answered,seeing a ray of hope in the very focus of her remorse.
I hope he may,even if we had still to part till I am ready for you,as we intended.
Elfride did not reply.
You dont seem the same woman,Elfie,that you were yesterday.
Nor am I.But good-bye.Go back now.And she reined the horse for parting.O Stephen,she cried,I feel so weak!I dont know how to meet him.Cannot you,after all,come back with me?
Shall I come?
Elfride paused to think.
No;it will not do.It is my utter foolishness that makes me say such words.But he will send for you.
Say to him,continued Stephen,that we did this in the absolute despair of our minds.Tell him we dont wish him to favour us--only to deal justly with us.If he says,marry now,so much the better.If not,say that all may be put right by his promise to allow me to have you when I am good enough for you--which may be soon.Say I have nothing to offer him in exchange for his treasure--the more sorry I;but all the love,and all the life,and all the labour of an honest man shall be yours.As to when this had better be told,I leave you to judge.
His words made her cheerful enough to toy with her position.
And if ill report should come,Stephen,she said smiling,why,the orange-tree must save me,as it saved virgins in St.Georges time from the poisonous breath of the dragon.There,forgive me for forwardness:I am going.
Then the boy and girl beguiled themselves with words of half-parting only.
Own wifie,God bless you till we meet again!
Till we meet again,good-bye!
And the pony went on,and she spoke to him no more.He saw her figure diminish and her blue veil grow gray--saw it with the agonizing sensations of a slow death.