第21章 Chapter (3)
Presently, after we had reached our encampment, he came to my marquee, and like one greatly disordered, said, "Horry, my life is a burden to me;I would to God I was lying on yonder field at rest with my poor men!""No! no! none of that, colonel," said I, "none of that;I trust we shall live to pay them yet for all this."And so it turned out. And though for humanity's sake, I ought not to BOAST of it, yet we did live to pay them for it, and often too: and in the same bloody coin which they gave us that day. And although in that fiery season of my days, and when my dear country was in danger, it was but natural for me to rejoice in the downfall of my enemies, yet I was often witness to scenes, which to this day I can never think of but with sorrow -- as when, for example, after dashing upon an enemy by surprise, and cutting one half of them to pieces and chasing the rest, we returned to collect the horses and arms of the slain. Who, I say, without grief could behold those sad sights which then offered themselves, of human beings lying mangled over the crimson ground --some stone dead, some still alive and struggling, with brains oozing from their cloven skulls -- and others sitting up, or leaning on their elbows, but pale with loss of blood, running in streams from their mortal wounds, and they themselves looking down, the while, sadly thinking of home and of distant wives and children, whom they shall never see again.
Such thoughts, if often cherished, would much abate the rancor of malice in the hearts of those whose sad destiny it is to kill one another;especially if it were known how short sometimes are the triumphs of the victor. It was remarkably so in the present case: for colonel Maitland, of the Highlanders, who had contributed a large part to this very unexpected victory, was so elated by it, that he took to hard drinking, and killed himself in a single week, and the sickly season coming on, the greater part of the garrison perished of the yellow or bilious fever!!
Thus friends and foes the same sad fortune shar'd, And sickness swallowed whom the sword had spar'd.
Many gallant men were the victims of count D'Estang's folly in this affair;among the number was that impetuous Polander, the count Polaski.
But none fell more universally lamented than the heroic Jasper.
Every reader must wish to hear the last of this brave and generous soldier.
And they shall have it faithfully, for I happened to be close by him when he received his death's wound; and I was with him when he breathed his last.
Early in the action, the elegant colors presented by Mrs. Elliot, had been planted on the enemy's works; and the fury of the battle raged near the spot where they waved. During the whole of the bloody fray, Jasper had remained unhurt. But on hearing the retreat sounded, he rushed up to bear off his colors, and in that desperate act, was mortally wounded. As he passed by me, with the colors in his hands, I observed he had a bad limp in his walk.
"You are not much hurt, I hope, Jasper," said I.
"Yes, major," he replied, "I believe I have got my furlough.""Pshaw," quoth I, "furlough indeed, for what?""Why to go home," he answered, "to go to Heaven, I hope.""Pooh!" said I, and having, as the reader must suppose, a good deal to attend to, I turned off and left him. However, his words made such an impression on me, that soon as duty permitted, I went to see him, and found too true what he had predicted; the ball had opened a blood vessel in the lungs which no art could stop, and he was bleeding to slow but certain death.
As I entered the tent, he lifted his eyes to me, but their fire was almost quenched; and stretching his feeble hand, he said, with perfect tranquillity, "Well, major, I told you I had got my furlough.""I hope not," I replied.
"O yes!" said he, "I am going -- and very fast too; but, thank God, I am not afraid to go."I told him I knew he was too brave to fear death, and too honest to be alarmed about its consequences.
"Why, as to that matter, sir," said he, "I won't brag: but I have my hopes, notwithstanding I may be wrong, for I know I am but a poor ignorant body, but somehow or other, I have always built my hopes of what God may do for me hereafter, on what he has done for me here!"I told him I thought he was very correct in that.
"Do you, indeed?" said he. "Well, I am mighty glad of that --and now major, here's the way I always comfort myself:
Fifty years ago, (I say to myself,) I was nothing, and had no thought that there was any such grand and beautiful world as this.
But still there was such a world notwithstanding; and here God has brought me into it. Now, can't he, in fifty years more, or indeed in fifty minutes more, bring me into another world, as much above this as this is above that state of nothing, wherein I was fifty years ago?"I told him that this was, to my mind, a very happy way of reasoning;and such, no doubt, as suited the greatness and goodness of God.
"I think so, major," said he, "and I trust I shall find it so;for though I've been a man of blood, yet, thank God, I've always lived with an eye to that great hope. My mother, major, was a good woman;when I was but a child, and sat on her lap, she used to talk to me of God, and tell how it was he who built this great world, with all its riches and good things: and not for himself, but for ME! and also, that if I would but do his will in that only acceptable way, a good life, he would do still greater and better things for me hereafter.
"Well, major, from the mouth of a dear mother, like her, these things went so deep into my heart, that they could never be taken away from me. I have hardly ever gone to bed, or got up again, without saying my prayers. I have honored my father and mother;and, thank God, been strictly HONEST. And since you have known me, major, I believe you can bear witness, that though a strong man, I never was quarrelsome."I told him, nothing afforded me more satisfaction, than to remember that, since he was now going to die, he had always led so good a life.