第13章
PREDICTIONS FOR THE YEAR 1708.
WHEREIN THE MONTH, AND DAY OF THE MONTH ARE SET DOWN, THE PERSONSNAMED, AND THE GREAT ACTIONS AND EVENTS OF NEXT YEAR PARTICULARLYRELATED AS WILL COME TO PASS.
WRITTEN TO PREVENT THE PEOPLE OF ENGLAND FROM BEING FARTHER IMPOSEDON BY VULGAR ALMANACK-MAKERS.
BY ISAAC BICKERSTAFF, ESQ.
I HAVE long considered the gross abuse of astrology in this kingdom, and upon debating the matter with myself, I could not possibly lay the fault upon the art, but upon those gross impostors who set up to be the artists.I know several learned men have contended that the whole is a cheat; that it is absurd and ridiculous to imagine the stars can have any influence at all upon human actions, thoughts, or inclinations; and whoever has not bent his studies that way may be excused for thinking so, when he sees in how wretched a manner that noble art is treated by a few mean illiterate traders between us and the stars, who import a yearly stock of nonsense, lies, folly, and impertinence, which they offer to the world as genuine from the planets, though they descend from no greater a height than their own brains.
I intend in a short time to publish a large and rational defence of this art, and therefore shall say no more in its justification at present than that it hath been in all ages defended by many learned men, and among the rest by Socrates himself, whom I look upon as undoubtedly the wisest of uninspired mortals: to which if we add that those who have condemned this art, though otherwise learned, having been such as either did not apply their studies this way, or at least did not succeed in their applications, their testimony will not be of much weight to its disadvantage, since they are liable to the common objection of condemning what they did not understand.
Nor am I at all offended, or think it an injury to the art, when Isee the common dealers in it, the students in astrology, the Philomaths, and the rest of that tribe, treated by wise men with the utmost scorn and contempt; but rather wonder, when I observe gentlemen in the country, rich enough to serve the nation in Parliament, poring in Partridge's Almanack to find out the events of the year at home and abroad, not daring to propose a hunting-match till Gadbury or he have fixed the weather.
I will allow either of the two I have mentioned, or any other of the fraternity, to he not only astrologers, but conjurers too, if Ido not produce a hundred instances in all their almanacks to convince any reasonable man that they do not so much as understand common grammar and syntax; that they are not able to spell any word out of the usual road, nor even in their prefaces write common sense or intelligible English.Then for their observations and predictions, they are such as will equally suit any age or country in the world."This month a certain great person.will be threatened with death or sickness." This the newspapers will tell them; for there we find at the end of the year that no month passes without the death of some person of note; and it would be hard if it should be otherwise, when there are at least two thousand persons of note in this kingdom, many of them old, and the almanack-maker has the liberty of choosing the sickliest season of the year where lie may fix his prediction.Again, "This month an eminent clergyman will be preferred;" of which there may be some hundreds, half of them with one foot in the grave.Then "such a planet in such a house shows great machinations, plots, and conspiracies, that may in time be brought to light:" after which, if we hear of any discovery, the astrologer gets the honour; if not, his prediction still stands good.And at last, "God preserve King William from all his open and secret enemies, Amen." When if the King should happen to have died, the astrologer plainly foretold it; otherwise it passes but for the pious ejaculation of a loyal subject; though it unluckily happened in some of their almanacks that poor King William was prayed for many months after he was dead, because it fell out that he died about the beginning of the year.
To mention no more of their impertinent predictions: what have we to do with their advertisements about pills and drink for disease?
or their mutual quarrels in verse and prose of Whig and Tory, wherewith the stars have little to do?
Having long observed and lamented these, and a hundred other abuses of this art, too tedious to repeat, I resolved to proceed in a new way, which I doubt not will be to the general satisfaction of the kingdom.I can this year produce but a specimen of what I design for the future, having employed most part of my time in adjusting and correcting the calculations I made some years past, because Iwould offer nothing to the world of which I am not as fully satisfied as that I am now alive.For these two last years I have not failed in above one or two particulars, and those of no very great moment.I exactly foretold the miscarriage at Toulon, with all its particulars, and the loss of Admiral Shovel, though I was mistaken as to the day, placing that accident about thirty-six hours sooner than it happened; but upon reviewing my schemes, Iquickly found the cause of that error.I likewise foretold the Battle of Almanza to the very day and hour, with the lose on both sides, and the consequences thereof.All which I showed to some friends many months before they happened - that is, I gave them papers sealed up, to open at such a time, after which they were at liberty to read them; and there they found my predictions true in every article, except one or two very minute.
As for the few following predictions I now offer the world, Iforbore to publish them till I had perused the several almanacks for the year we are now entered on.I find them all in the usual strain, and I beg the reader will compare their manner with mine.